Poetry in Progress

I am going to write a poem, and I want your help.
Reach into the deep recesses of your mind, then put a word or VERY short phrase in the comments, and I will include it in my poetic masterpiece.
I have no idea where the whims of my fancy combined with the varied additions of your delightful words will lead.
I look forward to our collaboration.

Do NOT submit the following:
1. Foreign curse words
2. Curse words that rhyme with luck or pucker or tucking or ducked
3. Curse words of a hitonious nature

I will post our collaborative work on Monday.
I will be channeling Dr. Suess for more help with my creative process.

To you, blog buddy, greetings I send,
that you may have a happy weekend.

DEADLINE for comments is 11:59 p.m. Saturday.

Smiles All Around

Smile #1: A great, big Happy Birthday to my DAD!!
My dad is a patient, kind, intelligent, wonderful man. We talk on the phone a few times a week about everything. If all kids had a dad like mine, the world would definitely be a better place. He is only 20 years older than I am, so he's just a young lad. I'm fixin' to call him as soon as I post this.
Smile #2: Awhile back, I wrote that I went to the grocery store with my grocery list. One of the items on my list was written "Spicy Italian." I got tickled because I thought about how shocking it would be if I literally brought home a spicy Italian from the store. Well, it happened again. I had a list with me, and I glanced down and read what I had jotted down, "Extra Fine Pilots." I needed to pick up a package of my favorite pens which are made by Pilot and have extra fine writing tips. I stood there chuckling like an idiot. It doesn't take much to make me laugh.
Smile #3 Yep, We're in Arkansas!!!!
We passed by this old fella's vehicular contraption which was parked at a gas station about a mile from our house. When we got home, my hubby grabbed the camera and headed back to take photos (inconspicuously, of course). I think the three-piece TruckHomeBoat is only legal on Arkansas roads. Yes, all three of these were hitched together.
Apparently this guy did not get the memo that Crack Kills!:

Hubby said the guy was a very friendly fella. When I see these photos, The Beverly Hillbillies' theme song plays in my head.
I'll be stopping by your place for moonshine and roadkill stew.
Ya'll come back now, ya hear?!!

Spilling the Beans

Thanks for all the "Happy Birthday" wishes you left for me last week.
Spill the Beans #1:
I am now 43 years OLD! Old is not very fun. I ordered a walker and a case of prunes and a case of Kaopectate.
My son baked this little, round cake (he really did make it) and decorated the plate and added a few more yummies for me: My daughter gave me a funny card that said, "Get your cake on!"
My hubby sent me gorgeous roses.
We visited our new house this weekend and took some photos of the progress. The builders are SLOW as Christmas! First they said it would be ready in August, then Sept, now the middle of October. I'm still trying to smile, but it is kind of a forced smile because I'm ANXIOUS!!
Spill the Beans #2:
I said I would not show photos of the house until it was done. I lied. Here's a peek:

I have one last thing to spill the beans about. I am really baring my soul here, so please do not laugh over this. If you laugh, I will not be able to share these kinds of details any more with you. This is a test of your maturity.
Spill the Beans #3: (Brace yourself!)
My hubby used to be a woman, and here's the proof:
Thanks for keeping your composure.
Smile a lot today. It will do you good.

The Clinch & Dash

I experienced an evening of what I call the Clinch & Dash.
It can be brought on by something you ate, or it can be the result of a virus.
Either way, you suddenly feel an urgent need to GO, so you clinch hard and make a MAD dash for the porcelain throne.
Even if you had been waiting for an extremely important phone call, and the phone rang just as you were mid-dash, you would not even consider making a detour to answer it. You know the consequences of such a move would be very grim.
You don't DARE expel any gas because you can't be sure that ONLY gas will be expelled, if you know what I mean. Of course, you do!
Sometimes there is cramping involved, but good fortune was mine, and I was spared that part of the intestinal ordeal.
Part way to the bathroom, you suddenly have to stop, for fear you may have an accident if you take another step.
Oh-Oh-OH!
You stand there, buttocks clinched with all your might so tightly you begin to shake; sweat forms upon your brow as you wait for a slight reprieve that will allow you to make it the rest of the way to the precious commode.
When at last you are seated upon the pot, no time elapses between cheeks meeting porcelain and the expelling of explosive contents that caused the initial need to clinch.
You begin to sing joyful praises and give thanks to whomever it was that invented the toilet. You know for certain you would NEVER have made it to an outhouse in time.
Luckily, this unpleasant condition lasted only one evening, and I am now good as new.

I leave you with a Gaelic blessing:
May the sun shine upon thee and thine,
May success be thine in all endeavors,
May thee forever avoid the Clinch & Dash,
And may thine oxen stay strong.

Oh, and one more thing:
Happy Birthday to ME!!!

In Memory of little Juliana

Four year old Juliana Valentine McCourt boarded an airplane in Boston headed for Los Angeles along with her mother, Ruth.
Ruth had made plans to enjoy some spa pampering with Juliana's godmother, Paige.
While Ruth and Paige anticipated spa treatments, little Juliana was dreaming of meeting Mickey & Minnie Mouse.
Juliana enjoyed going online and playing Disney games, and now she was actually going to Disneyland!
Juliana is described as being a very feminine little girl who had favorite dresses she liked to wear.
Her godmother, Paige, was on another flight from Boston to CA because she was using her frequent flyer miles.
It seems almost impossible that both airplanes would be involved in the same attack; but that is what happened.
Paige's plane hit the north tower, and eighteen minutes later, Ruth and Juliana's plane crashed into the south tower.
I am participating in a tribute that honors each person lost in the Sept. 11th attacks.
Look at Juliana's precious face.

I didn't know this beautiful child, but I am saddened and angered by the loss of her.
Juliana should be nine now, and she, her mother, and godmother should be with their family and friends, enjoying life.
They are not.
Remember Juliana.

It's My FIL's Birthday!!

Friday, September 8th is Fred's birthday. Wasn't he a cute little feller?
He proudly served his country in Korea, and has told us many stories about those days. He looked very handsome in his uniform, as you can see.
My hubby is visiting with his dad for his birthday. Fred is quite ill, and I'm sure will enjoy his son's visit. The kids call him Papa, and hubby and I call him Dad. I love him and hope he has a pain-free birthday with some good laughs on HIS day.
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The other day, I saw an Ex-lax commercial followed by a Depends commercial. THAT's smart marketing!
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You may have noticed my weekly number of posts has been decreasing.
Here's the scoop:
Our new house won't be ready until the end of the month, so we are still living in AR and have paid the rent through the end of Sept. BUT, I had to start college which is located near where we are moving to. This dilemma has made things quite busy for me. I'm on the road, back and forth to school as well as doing schoolwork, but still living in AR. My blog time is being eaten up! I will post once or twice weekly and visit my blog buddies once or twice weekly. I should have just given up going to college all together and bought one of those online degrees like the offer I received below.
I REALLY did get this offer by email:
I received an ad for a quick way to get a college degree.
The subject line read:
Everybody qualifys for our degrees.
Well, I guess so!
Obviously, being able to spell is NOT a qualification.

Good Birdie - Bad Birdie

Winged creatures have recently invaded our space.
This lovely hummingbird got trapped in our garage. He is the good birdie I referred to in my post title. He flapped until he was exhausted, and no matter how hard we tried to coax him, he would not fly low enough to get out of the open garage. Courtney grabbed her camera and was able to get some really good photos. I've never seen a tired hummingbird before, but his usually feverish flapping was slowed way down, due to exhaustion. The good news is, that we eventually were able to help him make his way outside by having him rest on a broom which we then brought outside.
Now, for the bad birdie. Before any of you set me straight about a bat not being a bird, let me say that I KNOW that, but the thing flies and has wings, so I consider it a hitonious bird-like creature, thus...a bad birdie. My hubby and son freaked me out by bringing it from the attic into the bedroom and scaring the living daylights out of me. Bad boys brought bad birdie into bedroom. Bad boys were beaten and banished. Both of these photos are worth clicking on to see enlarged views. One will make you smile, but the other one will send ultra-hitonious-to-the-max shivers up and down your spine. Enlarge that one only if you dare!!

I hope your Labor Day weekend has been relaxing. We have been so busy. I look forward to stopping by your blogs and catching up on your current news. I'll be by to see you, but I won't have a new post up until Thursday.